Tag Archives: inspirational

Power Up, Bring it On!

This post is dedicated to all the supermoms out there. Who knew that the tiny bump growing in your belly would one day unleash dormant powers that you never knew you possessed. In the first few days of your baby’s life you realize you can wake up at unearthly hours, sleep-walk to the crib, feed and burp a baby and go back to sleep. You can survive months or years without your daily quota of 8 hours of sleep. You become immune to stale spit-up all over your t-shirt or find yourself ignoring the dirty dishes calling for your attention.

How about the one that allows you to keep a deadpan face while your toddler is howling and screaming in the grocery store. Or the one that allows you to straddle a baby and do chores around the house.

If you have a boy or a girl who is into sports (unlike yourself) you suddenly develop motor skills you never thought you possessed. Shooting hoops or hitting a baseball like a pro becomes second nature to you. This goes for things you never warmed up to as a kid but then find yourself doing and also enjoying as a mom. Like say camping and the outdoors.

And then there are other brave moms who venture back to work while nursing infants. They work, attend meetings, commute, stay up at night feeding their babies, cook dinner and still have enough energy to go around. I call it the energizer bunny superpower. I never tapped into that power since I decided to stay home with the kids.

Now when my kids are in middle school and high school, I’m back at work full-time and have to get back home and take care of dinner and the dishes. Throw in some homework help as well and you can see how busy my day is.

Like that wasn’t crazy enough, I have to wake up at 5.00 a.m. to get my daughter to the bus stop at 6.00. A week into this schedule and I was ready to call it quits. But then my superpowers kicked in and somehow I manage to get through the week. There are moments when I find it hard to string a sentence together because my brain has fallen asleep.

Then throw in after-school activities and your walking-on-a tight-rope superpower gets activated to make sure you don’t end up falling on your face. It takes a while to grow into your superpowers so don’t be disheartened if you feel like you are falling apart.

Any challenge you face as a mom, be sure that there is some secret superpower you wield that can help you ace your game. Two sick kids and an ailing parent? You got it! Crazy commute and a husband who is travelling frequently? Bring it on!  Colicky baby and a brand new puppy? Oh yeah!

Now that I have kids, I have a lot of respect for my mom and the way she managed her time and energy to make sure that we were well-fed and that we had clean clothes to wear, while working full-time as a Hindi teacher. Her day started at 5.00 a.m. and she went to bed after 10.00. Also kudos to my dad for driving me, mom and my brother to and from work, college, school and wherever else we had to go.

Same goes for Ganga, my second grandmother who cooked and packed lunches and got me ready for school, and waited by the gate till I got home. My Dadima used to drop me off in school every single day before she went to work. And it was Sharma aunty who used to pick me up from school every evening. It’s not until I had to do it that I realized it wasn’t so simple to show up every day at the same time especially if you had to work or manage other responsibilities. This I call the time-keeper superpower. It makes sure kids are woken up in time to catch the bus, that lunches are packed and kids get picked up on time.

I may have missed a few. If you supermoms/dads out there have any more to add please comment. Power up! You got this!

 

 

The Fruits of Perseverance

It has been a while since I last blogged and I’m writing to share the realization of a long cherished dream. My struggle to find full-time employment in my field is something that shows up in my blogs from time to time. Regular readers are familiar with my transition from unemployed to underemployed to doing odd jobs that weren’t in my field. I have extolled the virtues of volunteering time and again and I still volunteer for an NGO even after getting hired as a contractor.

Although I loved working in schools, a part of me wanted to get back to writing and editing. My blog opened the door to many writing opportunities and several websites have  published my work. The next step was getting paid for the writing. I started writing for content mills and although they paid a pittance, it built up my confidence and honed my skills as a writer.

When I was in India, a referral from a old friend/colleague landed me a contract as a content writer. This was my first job as a writer in the corporate world. While I enjoyed the perks of working from home, it became apparent that after a long break one could benefit from the learning that occurs in an office environment. This role was quite different from writing for content mills and showed me where I could improve as a writer. Before I knew it 4 months were up and I was back to being unemployed.

Long bouts of unemployment coupled with our unsuccessful attempt to settle down in India made one thing quite clear to me. With kids whose future lay in our hands, I couldn’t put my career on the back burner anymore. You never know when life will throw you a curve ball and one has to be prepared. If I had been established in my career, maybe the trip to India may not have been so stressful. Even though my husband was not earning I could have run the household.

I came back to the U.S. with one burning desire – to find a full-time job that could support me and my family. While looking for jobs I continued to gain experience as a writer/editor by freelancing and volunteering. Two interviews later I got a call that changed my life. I interviewed for a job that seemed a right fit for me and got hired as a contractor to do web content editing. There was the promise of being hired full-time if I performed well. Five months into the job and I got hired full-time. Maybe it’s not a big feat for all of you reading this. But for me it has been 15 years since I had a full-time job (other than being a full-time mom).

For 11 years I couldn’t work in the U.S. because it took me that long to get my green card. Then another 4 years to find my way back to writing and editing. Along the way I have had many well-meaning relatives and friends advise me to take up an entirely different career path. Like say pharmacology or QA testing or even running a daycare.  But none of that appealed to me. Somehow I circled back to writing.

As I write this , others in my circle have had breakthroughs in other areas of their lives. Some have been blessed with babies after several years of heartache and pain. Others who have struggled with finances now have nest eggs that give them financial security and freedom. It took a long time for them and for me to realize our dreams but we persevered, kept the faith and took one step at a time in the direction of our dreams.

I cannot say I have reached my destination because ahead of me are more lessons, adventures and truths to explore. For those of you unsure of getting what you want or following your dream, I stand testimony to the fact that it can be done no matter how long or how hard you have tried or how unsuccessful you have been so far. So go for it!  You are supported by the universe and my good wishes are with you.

 

Perfect In My Eyes

When we look in the mirror we either like what we see or we don’t like what we see.  We see flaws or we see perfection. It even goes beyond the physical aspects to character traits or even how we feel about ourselves. Our relationship with ourselves covers the entire spectrum from best buddy to worst critic.  Sometimes it evolves into a fatalistic obsession or a self-destructive streak.

Those who obsess about the way they look, spend hours preening, grooming and purchasing the latest skin products that promise to keep wrinkles away. Take it to an extreme and you have women making multiple trips to the plastic surgeon to fix different physical features which are perceived as “flaws”. Some just end up worse than when they started although they won’t admit it to anyone but can’t seem to break the cycle, all the time filling the coffers of the plastic surgeons.

Then some others are so unhappy with themselves that they need to constantly numb their senses to get through another day.  Alcohol, drugs, coffee and even junk food replaces a sober disposition and healthy mind. Before they know it the one-time thing becomes a go-to thing that comforts them or puts them in an alternative state of mind.

Still others don’t dabble in drugs or Botox but think there character needs a overhaul. Countless self-improvement classes don’t help them arrive at the conclusion that they are perfect just the way they are. Still others drown themselves in mindless TV or video games that offer them respite from dealing with themselves.

And yet deep inside we know that we are perfect. We were born perfect and came from perfection. If what we came from – call it God, Source, Creator or Universe – were looking at you or me what would s/he see?  To understand that we need to understand the quality of perfection. Perfection sees perfection in all things. If you take a drop from the ocean and carry it a 1,000 miles away it would still have all the properties of the ocean – salinity, fluidity and density. You cannot strip it away from the drop. The same goes for us. We are beings of light, love and perfection. Putting us in dense bodies doesn’t take that away from us. We still are an essence of our creator. In other words the entire universe lives within us and we within the universe.

The separation is not real and when we begin to see that, we see perfection first in ourselves and then in everything around us. Does perfection mean we makes no mistakes? No. It means we don’t beat ourselves up over those mistakes. We accept who we are, how we look, how we feel and all the other 10,000 things that go with being a human being.

From acceptance comes love, an unconditional love that loves the crooked nose or the frizzy hair, the sensitive side and the sour moods. It is utter acceptance and love without questioning your perfection. Remember you are unique and there is no one else out there quite like you – not even your identical twin can replace you! You are a puzzle piece that fits even if you think you have a funny shape.

If you could see through the eyes of perfection, you’ll see that you try too hard to be what you are not, forgetting that you are great just the way you are and that you can do wonders if you simply set aside your doubts and misgivings and embrace 100% of you – undiluted and uncensored.

When you see perfection in yourself then you will not tolerate people who deliberately point at your flaws as a way to either make them feel better or a way to bring you down. At first you get defensive and even angry and then you realize that their mirror is cloudy and there is nothing you can do about it, except hand them a cloth and hope they will get to cleaning it soon. And if they don’t, then walk away and stop looking in their cloudy mirror.

Have you ever handed a mirror to a baby and had the feeling that the baby really doesn’t know it is looking at its own reflection.  Can you look back and see when in your life you stopped admiring the face staring back at you in the mirror? Why did you stop? Didn’t you come from that perfect baby who didn’t judge itself so harshly?

Go back to your perfection. Feel it deep inside of you every day. That is how the Universe sees you. As part of its perfect infinite self. And when you do the world will right itself.

Disconnecting From the Matrix

Years ago I watched the movie “The Matrix” (several times for Keanu Reeves) and it seemed like a fantasy with no element of truth in it. But when I watched it when I was older (and wiser – ahem!) it seemed not too far fetched from the reality we wake up to every day. The daily grind. Put your nose to the grindstone and chug away. Work hard to pay the bills, provide for your family, save for retirement, buy that big house or fancy car, pay for that destination wedding or island getaway. The whole time losing yourself to chaos and missing out on the miracle that is life. Losing health and happiness over needless dramas that play out endlessly. Feed your body junk and fail to feed your soul. Live a boring, passionless life full of drama and unhappiness. And then teach another generation to do just that because you cannot get your blindfolds off and see what life really is about until you make an exit.

Life is freedom, happiness and choices made from a place of joy and love. Fear drives us to hold on tight to jobs that make us miserable or relationships that don’t nurture us. Fear tells us that we are not good enough or strong enough to take care of ourselves and that we have to give our power away to authority figures.  And then when it all becomes too much, something snaps and our whole world of illusion comes crashing down. The days that follow are filled with fear and a mad frenzy to get things back to where they were – rebuilding the same old house of cards because it feels familiar and comfortable. The prison with no windows – where the light cannot obliterate the fear.

Sometimes the divine hand intervenes and stalls the progress just long enough for the shades to fall off. Just long enough to wake up from the dream and see the world for what it is. A big lie. A fantasy. An alternate reality put in place to keep us from waking up to the true power that lies within. The power that can set us free and help us soar above the drama and chaos.

For some that one wake-up call is enough and they can never go back to their old selves and old lives. For some it is a constant back and forth between illusion and crystal-clear clarity. Between bliss and drudgery. Between the ego and the wisdom of the soul. Between what is expected of you and what you truly desire. At some point the whole exercise seems futile and one dumps the world or one’s inner journey all together. But some emerge triumphant and shine the way for others.

Disconnect from living life in a trance, going through the same motions over and over again. Cramming so much into your life that you have no time to pause and ruminate. Awareness requires space and the more space you create the more aware you are. Turn off the TV, computer and phone. Listen rather than talk. Quiet the chatter in your head. Get outside in nature. Live your life unscheduled. With lots of free time thrown in every day. Then what really matters will become clear to you. The illusive world melts away and you are left with only the brightness of your soul illuminating the way to a life full of joy, creativity and love.

From Zero to Hero in 6

This post is long over due. February was a busy month. I had a couple of interviews and had this feeling that I was really close to snagging a job. But that phone call I was waiting for never came. One day I was wondering if I should do the substitute training course to get a job at the school district, when a recruiter called. She felt I was a good fit for the job (yeah they all do and once they’ve forwarded your resume they forget all about you). So she said I needed to do an editing test. That perked me up as I recalled getting my first job straight out of university after doing an editing test. The last job I landed when I was in India also happened after a series of tests.  I had some good test-taking skills, I figured. Interview skills? Now that was a different ball game all together.

I cleared this editing test and was to do a phone interview and a face-to-face interview. The phone interview got scrapped (whew!) but I still had to do the face to face. The recruiter told me it would be an hour-long interview and that gave me the jitters. I practiced for it as well as I could but I knew from past experience that you can’t always be prepared for every question. You have to be able to think on your feet and come up with something impressive even if you never encountered that particular scenario.

I had three people tossing questions at me randomly. Some were questions I was prepared for and some were not. The interviewers were friendly and did their best to make me feel comfortable. When they were done 40 minutes later (I don’t know if I would have lasted an hour!) I was taken on a tour of the office and met some other editors at the café. The casual and friendly vibe was quite appealing. And then when they showed me the yoga room I was totally floored.

Back home I told everyone that the interview went well. The recruiter told me that they usually decide within a day. Next day came and went, then another, then a whole week. The recruiter reassured me that she was still waiting to hear from them. I honestly did not expect to hear from them after a week. On the last day of February I got a call and finally heard the words I’d been waiting to hear for over 6 months.  “I have some good news for you. The company called and they want to hire you. When would you be able to start?”

I was ready to start the next day! But I pulled myself together and said I would start next week. But  a week wasn’t enough to get my background check and verification done. So then I was slated to start in the middle of March.

Three weeks have passed since I started working as an editor. From having too much time on my hands, I have gone to having every minute filled with activity. My formerly lazy weekends are now spent doing grocery shopping and cooking for the week. It took me over a decade and a half to get back to my career full time. I have to say it wasn’t easy (you know the whole story if you have been around since 2012 when I started this blog) but I persisted and now here I am. Patience, perseverance and prayer got me here and might I add not just my prayers but prayers of some beautiful souls who I am lucky to have in my life (you know who you are!)

My husband also landed a job around the same time and our fortunes changed overnight. I’m glad we held on, kept the faith and kept trying even after facing several disappointments. Now when I tell my kids not to give up when things get tough or they don’t succeed at first, they know that I am walking my talk and not just being preachy. And for the longest time the only reason I wanted to succeed was to teach them that nothing in life is impossible even if you face seemingly insurmountable circumstances.

This I know is true, for anyone who wants something and wants it bad – if you can dream it, work for it even when the results/rewards don’t appear and you have undying faith in yourself or a power larger than yourself, then you shall have it. Sending you all love and light and infinite gratitude for wishing me well, enquiring about me when I was going through a rough patch and praying for me and my family.