Tag Archives: soul

Guest Blog : How to Meet, Date and Marry your Soulmate in One Year! (by Shomita Sarah)

If you’re anything like me, reading this title would make you wonder if I was a little high or losing my mind. I promise I’m neither – this is the plain, honest truth as I’ve experienced it. If the title piqued your curiosity, then good. This is not really a how-to article…but it is a true-to-life experience article and honestly, I never expected to be the one to write something like this from my own experience.

Let me begin at the very beginning. The blogger I’m writing this guest article for is quite honestly my oldest (and very cherished) friend in the world. She and I were born two days apart in the same hospital in South India and our lives have been intertwined ever since. I like to say that God brought us together and has kept us together ever since. She has been a constant source of encouragement on pretty much every step where I’ve found myself faltering and particularly in the one niggling matter of finding “the guy”. A few years ago, when I was at one of those low points in my life – when every possible doubt you have weighs you down and you wonder – ‘is love ever going to find me’ and maudlin thoughts outweigh the rational – she counseled me to focus on what I wanted in a guy and make a detailed list and put it out there in the universe and wait. Easier said than done! Anyway, being at the end of the proverbial rope I decided to make that list and surprisingly, it does make you feel a little better. There’s something tangible about the written word. As a sneak preview, I’ll mention a few things on that hallowed list – tall, Irish, blue eyes, similar faith in God.  I eventually, let that list rest and went about my life, not really stressing as much about finding the guy but not really finding the guy either!

2013 started off feeling like a different year altogether. I knew something was coming this year, but didn’t know what exactly. I’d also finally gotten to the point where I decided to let the pining for “the guy” go and let him just come to me. I realized that I had a lot of good things on my plate already and if it wasn’t time for him to be on the same plate – then I could at least enjoy the rest. A cousin contacted me out of the blue and encouraged me to give a popular dating website another try – saying there were good men out there and I had to give it one more shot. So, I said to myself – why not?! Among the men that contacted me was this one guy whom I initially responded to because I found that he had a similar interest in traveling to Ireland. After a few exchanges, I started to have some doubts (as sometimes happens with online communications) and almost ended the exchange.

It would’ve surely ended there, if he hadn’t had the ‘audacity’ to call me out on my own fears and in a very down-to-earth manner give me the choice to find out if there was a possibility of a continued exchange between us. He let me set my own pace and ladies  tell me you don’t like a man who lets the girl set the pace! We started as friends – no pressure – just emailing, talking and texting and getting to know each other. We progressed to our first date on a snowy evening – that pretty much decided it for me. He was the IT guy. If I can refer back to my list again – he was tall, of Irish origin, blue eyed and shared my faith in God! We stayed all night talking and holding hands and it was simply the best date I’ve had. I started to fall in love with a good man and a gentleman – he even dusted the snow off my car! Might be a silly thing to remember but it mattered a lot to me.

We decided to become FB official – because who can say they’re really dating without letting the social network know about it right?! Less than four months later, on my 35th birthday, he surprised me – by popping the question and without a doubt, I accepted. The four months involved a whirlwind getting to know both families, lots of driving and texting and phone calls. Did I mention we were in a long-distance relationship? And did I mention that we will be tying the knot in less than 60 days?

Yup…it’s less than a year and I’ve managed to meet, date, get engaged and will soon be getting married to the guy I’ve waited a long while to meet. Ladies, pull that jaw up from off the floor. As unbelievable as this may sound…believe it…it happens! It took a lot of prayer, a lot of patient (and sometimes not-so-patient) waiting and the tiniest bit of hope that he existed. If you’re looking – don’t give up hope. Pray hard and trust that the right guy is out there and looking for you too. And when it comes to you, don’t fight too hard, give in and let yourself experience the wonder that is the love of a good man. Here’s hoping that the experiences married life brings will help us grow together as a couple!

The Dilemma

Who am I?

I don’t seem to know anymore!

I wake up in the morning

And stare blankly at the door.

Trapped in a body wracked with limitation,

Every breath is an act of suffocation.

Am I the sum total of my successes,

Or the product of my failures?


Everything is a lie and illusion is rampant,

It is taken to be real and there lies the delusion.

The truth is hard to swallow,

The pain too much to bear,

This separation between body and soul,

As the body stumbles and the soul soars,

This I’m sure I did not ask for!


To be of this world and not to be,

To belong and not fit in,

To be torn between the dream and the awakening,

Is a dilemma that I dread facing.


Disconnected from the love of the source,

A whirlwind of activity and emotions I force,

I trip and fumble trying to find

Something that will satisfy this deep thirst in my soul.

What is it that seeks to be birthed?

A tiny voice inside me speaks,

Which I try to drown in the quagmire that is my mind.

Feebly it cries – Happiness lies in the ‘IS’,

In the ‘Now’

In the everlasting that is there forever more.


Finding a Long Lost Love…

I met my soul sister when I was living the best years of my life. I had just graduated, landed a job without even trying, and engaged to be married to the most charming man who is the love of my life. We worked for the same company and she lived just yards away from my grandmother’s house. We used to walk or take a bus back home. I have fond memories of those days and the way she was always so tuned to my energy and emotions. But I knew those carefree days spent sharing chocolates and life would soon come to an end. I knew I had to move halfway across the globe after I got married.

Thank God for e-mail and chat and VOIP phones! We would be in touch, I thought. I was wrong! I met her one last time on my wedding day and then I flew to the U.S. I didn’t realize that would be the last time I saw her or heard from her in a long long time. She quit her job, moved and stopped using her e-mail account. The e-mails I sent her bounced back. Former colleagues had no clue as to where she might be. I was crushed. Although I had known her only for a few months we had connected at a very deep level. Like a soul connection. So I never gave up looking for her.

When Orkut came along I spent an insane number of days and hours searching for her. Peering at countless tiny pictures and profiles hoping to see her face. But I got nothing. Years went by but I still knew in my heart that I’d find her. So when Facebook was born the search began all over again. The search for a friend like no other. Again no trace of her.

Then one day after I had moved to Florida and got my license and started believing in miracles I searched for her. And there she was photo and all. I was thrilled to bits! I found her! I found her! I finally found her! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!  I messaged her, quite unsure if she would remember me. But she did. I guess having a rare name helps! And this is the part I never expected. She was equally thrilled to get back in touch. After all these years! Imagine if after years of searching and finding someone, you got a lukewarm reaction. Oh Hi…Nice to see you too. Thank God that didn’t happen to me.

And then it got me wondering why did I find her when I found her. Why not before? Why not later? Why ever? I couldn’t answer that for a long time. But one day I stumbled upon it. I wasn’t the person she knew years ago. Marriage, kids. life itself had made me weary, unhappy. She never would have connected with me in those years when I was still finding myself. She knew the bubbly, giggly girl who was on cloud nine, with the whole world at her feet and her whole life ahead of her. She never would have recognized the dull, dreary, sleep deprived, stay-at-home mom I had been for many years.

But the moment I shifted into a state of contentment, fully aware of my power, taking my life by the reins instead of being a piece of driftwood, I was able to find her. And I found her at the right time. They say a friend is someone who knows the melody of your heart and sings it to you when you have forgotten it. I had forgotten. Forgotten my own strength, the beauty of my being, how much I mattered. She gently, yet firmly reminded me. She tore down my wall of excuses and exposed me to the reality of who I am. I owe my writing to her. The joy and gratitude I feel overwhelms me. The creative block I had for years melted with her encouragement and her undying faith in me pulled out the stopper and now I’m free and my creativity flows and flows and flows. Thank you N.G. Thank you for everything!